Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Bambi

You think "watching paint dry" is just an expression, but you're wrong - I spent a few hours held hostage by a newly painted front door. The door should have dried in four hours, buuuuuut it was full dark and insects were wandering in to my house and the paint was STILL sticky.

A phone call from brimful helped me pick my chin off my chest, and I set off for "home"....only to realize that I had forgotten my bag containing my wallet etc. at my house. Turn around. Repeat.

Have you ever had an out-of-brain experience? What I mean is that you know that you are processing away on some problem or issue, but at the same time, it's like your brain is floating in the corner of the room observing you deal with the situation? Maybe some kind of cranial astral projection.

I was bone tired on the last little stretch, and feeling sorry for myself. Not a good combination, but I really have too much on my plate and not enough space for perspective. I had my cerebral out-of-cranium experience when I saw the deer: I was braking and steering away from it at the same time as I thought, "wow, I'm actually reacting and in enough time to avoid a problem." It all felt so slowed down. The sound of my brakes engaging. Tightening my grip on the steering wheel. The headlight illuminating half her body as she swerved away from my car, and then back towards it. My front left wheel just crossing the double yellow, thinking that I could correct and get back over in more than enough time.

As I was congratulating myself on my reaction time, I realized that I was steering away from Mama Deer...and towards Bambi. I couldn't see the fawn at first because the curve of its spine fell just below my headlight. When it turned to follow Mama, its leaf-shaped ear caught the light.

I didn't hit either of them, and no one hit my car. I drove the next 2 minutes one-handed, the other hand pressed flat against my mouth, holding it all in. Here's what I realized: even at my most drained, I am lucky. My day was bookended by nature. This morning, I watched an irridescent midnight blue and black butterfly sun its wings on my front step. Although I would have preferred to have skipped the encounter with the doe-eyed, I had the opportunity to be (wo)mano-a-deero, and you don't get that every day. Also, near-synchronicity is an eerie, eerie thing.

Savor where you are - there are moments and ideas to be absorbed at that very spot.

5 comments:

brimful said...

Dooooooooooood... you totally just blew my mind with the deer encounter.

Also, this just confirms that it's always good to get off cell phones when you need to drive late at night. Glad I didn't babble any longer with you tonight, or I'd have even more deer on my conscience.

Sushant Bhatia said...

It would be so cool to see how your brain looked (with one of those brain scanners) at that exact moment. I bet it was like a million lights firing into existance, their pathways burning in furious brilliance as they colluded to give you a burst of speed in your thoughts to explore your actions. How cool would it be to have seen that in action...and I bet the adrenaline gave you quite a fix too. Glad to know that all creatures (human and deer) are ok. :-)

Jay said...

Wow, Maisnon! I had a gruesome reminder of the other possible outcome a couple of weeks ago. Glad to hear that no one got hurt!

LS said...

i've read about you (anna and brimful), seen pics of you, and finally i've made it to your blog.

Coincidentally I had my first out-of-brain driving home late on monday night. For what seemed like a minute my thread of thought seemed to continue when I realized that I was almost wearing out of the bridge. I managed to recover in good time, and my father who quietly sat next to me didn't seem alerted... probably asleep or in his own out of the brain moment.

I've enjoyed reading many of your posts... and if you are in Cali by the time I get there next week, I might get the pleasure of meeting this cool gal that brimful and anna rave about ;-).

Have a good weekend!

suitablegirl said...

i can testify that this woman can DRIVE. and i never say that about anyone. she is unflappable and after reading this post, i'm so grateful for that. glad you were safe, gladder that you reminded us of that little lesson at the end...