Right now, I don't like myself very much. Everything seems to be a jumble of elbows and scratchy woolen sweaters. Hat tip to Pink, it's bad when you annoy yourself. I'm saying things I don't really mean, and I don't know why. I'm venting to friends, then shooting down everything they say.
I'm not going to get into a litany of complaints because they aren't that fun to read (unless you have enough distance to make it funny - which, right now, I don't) and because then I'll feel like I'm whining (i.e. I will irritate myself even.more.)
I managed to head into the city TWICE on Saturday. The first time, I consumed brimful's dad's favorite - the Thai food with pleine de brim and SJM. Mmmm....the Thai food. The second time, unfortunately, I was apparently wearing my crankiest pair of crankypants. Practically every detail irked me, like those little snips of hair down the back of your shirt after a haircut. Having said that, dinner at the Stinking Rose was delish. Mmmm...the garlic.
Sunday just was not pretty. As usual, I was caught in the gap between expectations and reality, between what you think you can control and what you actually control. I've suffered a series of (minor) disappointments recently and I feel like I'm supposed to be so happy and excited about the future (new job, new home, new car) when really I just want flannel pajamas, a nap, and maybe some butternut squash soup.
Sometimes Mondays really are the best - the funk had to be cut short because work called. And you know what? I was really ready to leave it behind anyway. I truly am excited about everything that's going on, as usual - I have to learn to accept some uncertainty. Things get done in their own time - not on my schedule. I drove the 2.5 miles to work blasting Patsy Cline and singing along with a smile on my face.