Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Anonymous

Anonymous said...
I love reading your blog. You are so positive and such a vivid writer.

..........

Dear Anonymous,

You have no idea how much this comment means to me. I have been very seriously considering dropping my blog. No, very serious consideration would require more effort than I have been putting in. It's been more like benign neglect. Every time I think of my blog, I wonder what the point is - I feel like it has fulfilled its purpose, and maybe I should just let it go. I read old posts, and I don't think that I have the same energy that I once had. We are each our own harshest critic, but lately I've had to start posting without re-reading because everything sounds so ... cringe-worthy to me. I feel like "who wants to read that??" when I used to think "who cares? You're writing for yourself and a very select group of friends."

Things are still going on in my life (obviously.) I still think thoughts (again, obviously.) But I seem loathe to share them. There's just something missing between the here of experience and the there of describing it and sharing it with the Interwebs. In part, there are things going on in my life that are excitant, but that I want to keep to myself. In part, I'm going through changes (thanks, Ozzy!) and I feel like I have so much energy channeled inwards that I don't have much to direct outwards. And some of it may just be that I'm tired.

I don't believe in making decisions before it is necessary. Here is my plan: I leave for Indian next Friday. I expect that blogging will be limited while I'm away. However, I also think that I'll have plenty to say/sort out - so there should be some blogposts through at least the end of January. And, at that point, I'll reassess.

I think I need to figure out what role my blog plays in my life at this point. It used to sort of a sounding board for studying for the Bar, those particular frustrations, etc. It morphed into my moving saga (that would be a saga about moving, not, I hasten to add, a saga that was emotionally moving!) Then, adjusting to living in a new place and slowly it came to be about the little odds, ends, and minutiae of life.

Anyway, I blather (it's what I do!) Again, thanks for your comment - it meant a lot to me!

Sincerely,

maisnon

7 comments:

roonie said...

Even though I'm not an anonymous lurker, you have to know how much I enjoy your blog as well. I would be lost in the blogosphere without you and your wittiness. It's so refreshing and intelligent - and we all know how many blogs can't seem to meet those two requirements! You are a staple in my blog diet, and I would be wont for nutrition if you left my blog-blog-land.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous is not the only one who loves your blog for its positive energy and vivid writing. I've been quietly lurking here for a while too. I come here because it's one of the few online spaces by a bubbly, articulate woman. Might sound totally bizarre and creepo, but you sort of 'inspire' me. Heavy words I know. Anyway, whether you continue or not is up to you. If you feel the blog's purpose has been fulfilled then that's perfectly fine.

Maitri said...

Please don't quit blogging, love. I may not comment often enough, but read your words EVERYDAY. Do it as a personal cattharsis and for other women bloggers out there. Your inward-directed life is interesting, no matter what you think, and that stuff wants out.

The amateur psychologist has now left the building.

Anonymous said...

and I have been a regular lurker here for ages too! Whether you continue to blog or not, I must say that I have always enjoyed the quiet clarity and yes, the consistent optimism in all of your writings. good luck.

-roots

Mango Pickle said...

Oh no, we might have a case of blog depression. Please see here for help:

http://thenonist.com/index.php/weblog/permalink/a_nonist_public_service_pamphlet/

A N N A said...

it's so hard to be a non-conformist when you agree with everyone else. i'll just let yaz sing it: "don't go".

maisnon said...

Thanks for the comments, y'all!! I've put them into the percolator and I'm thinking about it all.